#wingtip: 4 Keys to Dating Success

#wingtip: Find a Support Group

The 50% Rule & How It Relates to Meeting Women

I am sure many of you who read this already are familiar with this. Others may forget about this so it’s never a bad thing to refresh everyone’s mind. I remember sitting down and talking with someone the other day and they asked me, “So how do you really handle rejection? In the beginning, you were obviously rejected more than you were accepted. How did you deal with that?”

Here’s what I said.

For me, I decided to treat making a connection with women like inviting them to a house party. If you invite 100 women, 50 are going to say ‘yes.’ Out of those 50, about 25 will actually show up. With all of your hosting duties, you’ll probably end up talking to 12 of these women for a decent amount of time throughout the night. Out of these 12, you’ll probably get 6 numbers from them. When you contact them, you may get 3 women to call you back. And out of those 3, maybe one will keep regular contact and a relationship will ensue. (The same concept goes for women trying to meet men as well.)

It sounds crazy but that’s how it is out there. You are going to go out there and meet many women (if you are actually taking action and making an effort). A very small percentage of those women will actually continue to talk to you 6 months down the road. As you get better at creating connections and become more comfortable with yourself, you will notice your success rate going up.

But at the beginning, you’ll be on the grind. You’ll be rejected. People may even laugh at you or think you’re weird or creepy. In the end, it’s not about how bad you get rejected. It’s about how much you can take and keep going. That’s where the evolution comes in.

A part of handling rejection is coming to terms that it will happen. As good as I am with making a connection with people, I still get rejected every now and then. After a while, you just say to yourself, "hmm…that blows. Well, I gotta keep moving.” Even at your best, you may mess up. It happens to everyone. And it’s ok. This is all for the greater good -

To become the best person we can possibly be and the only way to do that is to evolve through interaction.

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Some Weekend Words of Encouragement

I hope you guys are enjoying the Giving and Taking Series. It’s been a lot of fun and I will continue it on Monday and wrap it up at the end of the week.

But for tonight and this Memorial Day weekend, I wanted to give you some notes that I have in my iPhone. It inspired me to write this and I hope it can help you with something this weekend.

These are just some solid points that I kept reading to myself over several months to battle any fears I had about failing, rejection, meeting women and trying to do new things in my life.

Imagine yourself successful. Nothing positive will ever happen if you can’t even think that it could happen. Spend time to think about the desired outcome as detailed as possible. If it’s about dating, think about how awesome you’re going to look this weekend and the kinds of women or men you’ll be talking to. Think about how each interaction will be successful in one way or another. Maybe with one you’ll get a phone number and in another, you two will go to a different bar and have a mini-date where things can be more intimate. Whatever you want, make sure you can actually imagine the success happening.

Reflect on past success. When it comes to dating, whether it was “luck” or not, most of you have been successful with getting a number, or a kiss or even a boy/girlfriend. It has happened before and it can happen again. Think about some of the things that you did that made it easy for you to get that number or kiss. If you can’t remember that, then think about the qualities about you that made him or her attracted to you. Don’t make it seem like you haven’t done this “dating thing” before. Most of you have and were successful. You’re just trying to create a level of consistency.

Set definite goals. When you go out tonight, have some clear objectives. Maybe for tonight, you want to find someone that you’re into and get his or her number. After that, you’ll want to follow up with him or her tomorrow and set up a date for Sunday. That’s just an example, but your goals should be pretty straightforward.

At the same time, don’t go out with these bottled up intentions because it will show through your body language and your conversations. Just keep them in the back of your mind as you’re interacting with people, check up on yourself every once in a while to see how you’re doing.

In the end, this is all a learning experience.

Respond positively to life. Being positive and just going out not only to learn but also to have fun is a huge to finding your success. At the end of the night, you still have yourself and the life that you’re living is something no one else can take from you.

Go out, have fun and no matter what, stay positive.

I’ll end this with a quote that was at the end of my notes. It’ll pretty much explain everything.

“Our only limitations are those we set up in our own minds.”

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