I think what he did was not the best idea. Even hearing the voicemail that was leaked, telling his mistress to clear his name from his phone gave me the chills. Here is a professional superstar (also known as an athlete), who has dominated his sport since he stepped into it, has made more money than anyone who has played anything with a ball, and has so much more time ahead of him to rule the sports world. Now, he’s in the middle of what he calls a “transgression.”

But what has he done that Kobe Bryant hasn’t done? Or Michael Jordan (gambling)? Or Andre Aggasi (drugs)? If anything, I really believe that this will be the point in which Tiger Woods finally becomes a man.

Everyone thought that he was untouchable. I’m sure he even felt the same way after a while. When you hear something so much, you start to believe it - doesn't matter what it is. He was so good at being concise, private with the public and making sure no one from the media was able to pry into his personal life. There was more information leaked out of Fort Knox then about his family. Then this very harshly brought him down to "our level of humanity."

But I think he’ll recover quite well. Maybe this will make him get out of his own stubborn ways and remember that his father left him to carry on his name with pride. Maybe this will make him refocus and reprioritze his life and his goals. Maybe this will make him realize that the media will do whatever it takes to get the information it needs that will help or destroy someone’s image and there’s nothing he can do to prevent that. Maybe this will teach him to man-up and accept more of his mistakes than just the major one he’s being scrutinized for currently.

I personally think now that he is “human,” he will be more lethal than ever, on and off the golf course. Just like how Michael [Jordan] came back, won another three championships and secured his right as arguably the best basketball player of all time, Tiger will make his surge, completely wipe out the record books and leave a stronger history than what he was already on pace to do.

For those who are reading, take this bit of advice. Do not do what he just did. It’s human to make mistakes, but not to cheat. Infidelity is just NOT cool. No matter what changes in your life, it’s important to stay grounded, be rational despite potential changes of emotion that may affect your thinking, and most importantly, maintain the E & O.

Like Tiger, you’ll survive.

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November 20, 2009

Thomas Edwards

Show Your Cards From the Get-Go

November 20, 2009

Thomas Edwards

Not four months in.

This is a piggyback post from Kelli Lawless and her blog, Dating and Mating in America. When I read the headline, I was very curious. Then after reading it, I got upset. I got angry. It pumped me up so much that I can’t fall asleep on the BoltBus anymore. I might as well talk about this.

Too many guys do it.

You see a woman that you like and you want to be everything to her. You want to be everything that she likes and wants in her ideal man. You want to be the man she wants to marry and be with forever. But did you ever ask yourself,

“ARE you that man or are you POSING?”

This is a serious question to ask. There are too many men that ask me about what lines they should use on a certain type of woman and how they should dress to get with another type of woman. Fortunately, I don’t give them this kind of advice but they can definitely get it elsewhere. And men read and practice it to a tee. But beyond all of that, would you like to know what’s even worse?

It actually works.

Guys dress and act like the men women are looking for and women eat it right up (can you blame them?). Then, after a few dates or even a few months, they feel as though “they have them.” Now, they can “let up” and start being themselves.

As I type this, I feel like what I am writing doesn’t even make any sense.

Then, women are left wondering, “WTF?” and run for high water, leaving men thinking that they screwed up some other way.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Listen, you are the problem. You fucked up from the get-go. You weren’t yourself. It happened to me when I was in college. I made so much effort in being the man everyone wanted me to be, and less effort on making who I was even better. Then, when I figured I had it all, I reverted back to what I was used to. I mean, think about it. Being someone you’re not is A LOT of work. Now that I have it all, there was nothing better than going back to being me. After that moment, I started to lose everything to the point where I had to start over from square one.

Now, after doing it right and sticking to being myself, I find there is even MORE value in being YOU rather than represent this figurative ideal. To people who will still alter who they are to appease to someone else: Fuck that. If you want to be someone else, go apply to be someone’s body double for a movie. Stay true to who you are, and I promise you will persevere. Being you is enough work to give yourself but it’s the easiest because that’s the only thing you know how to do best.

Remember the goal: to get someone to love you for YOU, not who you’re not.

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