Men, What Are Your Needs?

Isn't that a weird question to ask? I mean, who has ever asked you that? Have you ever thought about it? One of my best friends, OhDoctah, gives women advice on how they can fulfill a man's needs. I think his advice is spot on, which leaves me with two questions?

Men, is support all you need long-term? What are some of your other needs?

Women, do you think support is that simple? What other needs do you think men have?

What Can a Date Coach Do For You?

This is something I came across that talks about why getting a dating coach is beneficial for ANYONE. I have been wanting to write about this for a while and thank goodness someone else beat me to it (and was able to nail it so that I didn't have to write it anyway). Credit goes to Eric Disco, the man over at Approach Anxiety for this great write up. I frequently read his blog because he and I share similar beliefs when it comes to personal development through dating.

A good coach can push you out of your comfort zone.

 No matter who you are, we all have a limited view of what’s possible, not only in others, but in ourselves.

The German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer once said, “Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world.”

A coach can push you beyond what you thought is possible, in ways you can’t push yourself.

Sometimes it takes seeing and hearing another person do what you thought was impossible before you believe it’s possible to do it yourself.

A coach can give you an outside look at yourself that you can’t see.

If only we could see ourselves as others see us.

Well, a good coach can honestly tell you what’s working and what’s not working with what you’re doing.

Sometimes you think it’s one thing, and you keep working to change that, when in reality, it’s something completely different that’s holding you back.

It can be difficult to see what that thing is because you don’t see yourself in the action.  You only see how she’s reacting.  A coach can see both.

A good coach can pick out what is working.

There are probably already a number of things you’re doing right, things that are working for you.  And in your trial-and-error search to improve, you may stop doing some of those things.

A good coach will not only tell you what needs to be fixed, he will build up what’s already working.  That may be completely different than what works for someone else.

A good coach helps you prioritize.

A good coach can also tell you what is the most important thing you should be working on now.  He can pick out the thing that will have the most effect on our game.

I see it all the time with guys.  They want to fix 20 different things.  And because they’re newbies, I could easily pick out 20 things they could be doing differently.

But I don’t.

I find that one thing that is holding them back the most and we work on that together.

Throwing multiple things at a guy to work on will just leave him thinking about too much stuff.  And, worse, he’ll feel like he’s doing so many things wrong.

A good coach can help you start things out the right way.

For some guys, doing things the wrong way can be harmful.

A coach knows how to take you through the process in a way that works, is enjoyable and gets good reactions from women.

You’ll never get 100% good reactions from women no matter what coach you’re with.

But if you are pushing yourself too hard, too fast or in the wrong way, and getting mostly negative reactions from women, you start to build a “psychological armor” around yourself.

You become self-protective.  Women then react even more negatively to you. This makes you even more self-protective. A vicious cycle.

And the worst part about this is that you begin to anchor negative feelings with meeting strangers.

Conversely a good coach can gently push you out of your shell in a way that starts to get positive reactions from women.

This in turn builds your confidence. And you start to associate positive feelings with meeting strangers.

A coach can hold you accountable.

One of the best things about getting long-term coaching is that that you are reporting back to someone regularly about your progress.

That helps  keep you motivated to work on this stuff.

You push yourself that much more in between the times you see your coach.

Not only that, but your coach can help you set up goals and work toward those goals.

Without specific goals it’s very difficult to make progress.

A coach can teach you something you would have never learned on your own.

You may know a lot already.  You may be brilliant at some things.

The beauty of coaching is that you are allowed to go back to square one and pretend you don’t know anything.

Even me.

I got to soak up John’s knowledge as if I’d never done pickup a day in my life.

And it only made me that much better.

The women I was meeting were hotter than ever.  I was getting more dates.

I had so much less approach anxiety.  My relationships were deeper and more fulfilling.

I even became a better coach because of it.

Coaching WILL change your life, in ways you can only dream of.

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Introduction to Fitness & Nutrition

I am really excited to announce that the new Fitness section of The Professional Wingman blog is brought to you by Revolution Fitness. Revolution Fitness is probably the most personable gym I have ever been in. The equipment is state-of-the-art, they offer a variety of classes and programs, the staff, led by Derek Christensen, is awesome, they have something called “the pit,” AND they even have a fuel bar – a personal favorite.

I talk a lot about personal development and how I help men and women develop confidence and live more fulfilling lives. Part of that personal development has a lot to do with how you feel, how you perceive yourself and how you take care of yourself. You want a healthy life? It all starts with a healthy body and mind. I really think that it’s important that you keep yourself fit. There’s no question that a healthy person is an attractive person. Period.

Some people are afraid to go to the gym. Others are just lazy. Yet, a lot of those people don’t even workout at home. Whatever the reason is, with the help of Revolution Fitness, I hope to reframe your thinking when it comes to fitness, exercise and going to the gym as the form of accountability to self-improvement.

I am going to put myself in a multi-week training program with Revolution Fitness and give you the inside take of what it’s like to workout with trainers, develop a program, see what this gym is all about and the importance of setting goals and fighting hard to achieve them. I consider myself a reasonably fit person (but with a crap diet) so I’m hoping the guys at Revolution Fitness will be able to challenge and push me to my limit.

Starting Monday, you will get full coverage of my training program and guest posts from the Revolution Fitness staff talking about what they’re passionate about – health, nutrition and exercise. I’m very excited about the future and I hope you are too.

For more information about the facility and classes, you can go to the Revolution Fitness site, or you can follow Revolution Fitness on Twitter for updates and special promotions.

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