self-esteem

Sex, Dreams, and Dating

Our dreams say a lot about who we are. What they also tell is how our perceptions deceive us when we're awake -- especially when it comes to dating.

It’s no surprise America is the most sexually repressed country in the world. We were constantly told growing up that thinking dirty thoughts are wrong.

That couldn’t be further from the truth.

Our brains are naturally wired to think about reproduction. It’s completely natural to think about wanting to have sex with someone.

In the Matrix (you knew a Matrix reference was coming), Mouse told Neo, 

“To deny our own impulses is to deny the very thing that makes us human.”

Tweet this.

But first, let’s talk about the myth that women don’t think, or in this case, dream about sex.

Nearly 9 out of 10 men dream about sex

We all know that men do -- and it’s true. To this day, many men still believe having sexual thoughts are bad. So instead, they dream about it. And men dream about sex a ton.

Well, researchers at the University of Montreal have been collecting data over the last 11 years, and found over 73 percent of women confessed to dream about sex. 

Nearly 3 out of every 4 women dream about sex

This stat isn’t just to prove thinking about sex is a completely normal thing. It’s for guys to understand that it’s necessary to be open and authentic about your intentions with women.

When you don’t let her know you’re sexually attracted to her, you’re basically telling yourself what you are feeling is wrong. The reality is it’s very likely the woman you’re talking to is thinking very similar thoughts.

And as much as she’s thinking about it, it’s even MORE taboo for her to be the one acting on those feelings, so it’s imperative you open the door, make your intentions known, and get her in a state where she feels comfortable opening up to you sexually.

Both men and women are insecure -- in different ways

Other interesting facts from this same study conclude men and women are sub-consciously insecure in different ways.

While guys are dreaming of flying through the air and saving the world from its constant impending doom, women on the other hand dream about things such as being paralyzed by fear, failing exams, and dying.

The total irony is when they’re awake, men and women project completely different attitudes, especially when it comes to dating. Men lack "superhero" courage and are fearful of approaching or trying to attract woman; and women put their guards up, projecting confidence and making men feel out of their league, when in reality, they fear making a bad choice in choosing a man.

With this new information, you can see a balance exists between how both men and women outwardly behave and what they sub-consciously think. So, it comes down to this:

In the dating world, we are all equal

So guys, the next time you see an attractive woman, understand if you try to approach and make a connection with her, not only may she be physically attracted to you, but there's also a chance she’s just as nervous as you.

Don’t let her external beauty prevent you from finding out how much beauty exists internally -- the more important of the two.